thefatjewish Paris Hilton Laudya Cynthia Bella - instagram lists #feedolist

thefatjewish

I sold my wine company @drinkbabe to the largest alcohol conglomerate in the world while wearing assless leather chaps to meetings and having one of the stupidest haircuts of all time. Anything is possible in 2019 you guys. No, but like seriously, fucking ANYTHING.

thefatjewish

2019 IS SO FUCKING WEIRD.

TheFatJewish

FUCK YES SUCK DICKS! Shouts to all my bears, wolves, otters, rats, pandas, bulls, cubs, circuit boys, closet jocks, twinks, twunks, drag queens, soft butches, stone butches, high femmes, lipstick lesbians, celesbians, diesel dykes, power bottoms, classic tops, verse boiiiis, leather daddys and everyone else in the rainbow THESE COLORS DON’T RUN #pride

THEFATJEWISH

YOU’D BE ABLE TO POSTMATES IT AND HAVE IT DELIVERED WITH A PINT OF ICE CREAM, GUARANFUCKINGTEED.

THEFATJEWISH

MY MOM HAS BEEN DOING THIS PASSIVE AGGRESSIVELY FOR FREE FOR 40 FUCKING YEARS

thefatjewish

I RECENTLY MET AN INFLUENCER MOM WHO IS PROMOTING “CBD EDAMAME FOR KIDS” AND AT THAT MOMENT I TRULY WISHED I HAD ALZHEIMER’S AND WOULD FORGET EVERYTHING I’VE EVER KNOWN ( @cxcope)

thefatjewish

I'm wayyyy too consistently stoned to keep all this fucking information straight, like TARMARIUS LONGNATHINGHAM, BROTHER AND UNCLE OF BARMARIUS LONGNATHINGHAM THE THIRD, RIGHTFUL HEIR TO THE THRONE OF THE SECOND KINGDOM OF DRAGONWIG, OKKKK NERDS ( @eliasswakim)

thefatjewish

PLEASE REMEMBER THAT THE PLANS YOU MAKE WHILE PEAKING ON MOLLY AT SUNRISE DURING A DIPLO SET AREN’T ACTUALLY GOING TO HAPPEN AND THAT YOU’LL PROBABLY NEVER SEE ANY OF THOSE PEOPLE EVER AGAIN. (Twitter: @hipstermermaid)

thefatjewish

SPOKE AT HARVARD BUSINESS SCHOOL YESTERDAY, WAS MOST LIKELY THE FIRST PERSON EVER TO WEAR REALTREE OVERALLS WITH NO SHIRT AND USE THE WORD “HANDJOB” THREE TIMES DURING A LECTURE. ME AND @anitaelberse (WHO IS AN ACTUAL LEGEND) TALKED ABOUT SOCIAL MEDIA, HOW WE BUILT @drinkbabe, AND THE TIME ME AND MADONNA PRANK CALLED BONO DURING A SLEEPOVER. AND TO ANYBODY OUT THERE WHO HAS A SICK BUSINESS IDEA, DM ME BECAUSE I WANT TO INVEST AND HELP YOU BUILD SO YOU GET RICH ENOUGH TO BUY A FALCON FOR ABSOLUTELY NO REASON. THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME @harvardhbs, MEMORIES WERE MADE.

thefatjewish

I’m garbage at listening, but I’m honestly amazing at guessing a white girl’s name. I can pick a Lauren out of a lineup. I can spot a Lindsay/Lindsey from a block away. I CAN CALL AN ALLIE/ALLY/ALY/ALI BY ONLY SEEING THE BACK OF HER FUCKING HEAD. It’s truly a gift. ( @saradesdinn)

thefatjewish

MY WINE COMPANY @DRINKBABE IS CONSCIOUSLY COUPLING WITH THE FUCKING QUEEN, MY DEAR FRIEND/ BUSINESS GURU @EMRATA. LOOK FOR HER ON BILLBOARDS NATIONWIDE, STOMPING THROUGH CITIES LIKE GODZILLA IF GODZILLA HAD A MUCH BETTER BUTT

thefatjewish

*Names children Kayden, Jayden, Brayden, Ayden, Kaylen, Jadyn, Hayden, Peyton, Braedynn, Caiden, Zaidyn, Mackenzie, McKenna, Makayla, Jordynn and Kayleigh* (@versace_tamagotchi)

parishilton

Who run the world? 🌎 Girls ✨👯‍♀️👯‍♀️👯‍♀️✨

thefatjewish

HIM AND GWYNETH ON THE BOTTOM LEFT AS A LESBIAN COUPLE IN BROOKLYN WHO OWN A STORE THAT ONLY SELLS SCARVES FOR DOGS IS MY FAVE

thefatjewish

DRUNK ME RECENTLY BOUGHT SOBER ME 40 DVD COPIES OF “NATIONAL TREASURE.” I DON’T EVEN OWN A FUCKING DVD PLAYER.

Laudyacynthiabella

Wohooooo..berapa hari yang lalu kita back to school looh😉 !! Hihihihihi mengenang masa2 sekolah.Aku ditemenin @zaskiasungkar15 @irwansyah_15 ! Jadiii yaaa makuku ,Alhamdulilah Sekarang @bandungmakuta punya varian baru loohh.. ada yang tau ga apa namanya ? & apa aja rasanya ... ayoo makuku siapa yang tauuu ?? 😉

Laudyacynthiabella

Alhamdulilahh hari ke dua bersama keluarga amir hatta.,seneng banget yang dari Bengkulu,Bali, Batam,& Jakarta. Semua hadir untuk nambo tersayang❤️ Terimakasih yaAllah untuk silaturahim yang indah ini🤲🏼 Semoga kita semua selalu dalam lindunganMu🥰

Laudyacynthiabella

🤲🏼🥰

Laudyacynthiabella

Keluarga Amir hatta❤️ #nambo89tahun

Laudyacynthiabella

Nambo❤️ #89yearsold #Alhamdulilah

Laudyacynthiabella

🎪❤️

Laudyacynthiabella

Hihihihihihi..ga nyangka yaaa,kita kenal dari 2003 loooh😳 Semua fase kita lewatin nya bareng,sekarang fase nya jaga persahabatan kita & saling mendoakan. Semoga kita selalu di jalan Allah SWT yaaa yang❤️

Laudyacynthiabella

☃️❄️

Laudyacynthiabella

💚

Laudyacynthiabella

Alhamdulillaah... wohooooooo!!! Silver play button dari @youtube sudah sampai. Hihihihi seneng deh.. makasih yaaa untuk subscriber #lcbchannel 😉 ❤️love!!

thefatjewish

LAST WEEK SOMEONE I KNOW CANCELED THEIR 15-PERSON BIRTHDAY DINNER ON THE DAY OF AND I SWEAR I FELT LIKE I HAD SHOT HEROIN

thefatjewish

ALL I FUCKING CARE ABOUT IS CARBS AND LIKE 3 PEOPLE

thefatjewish

STOP BLAMING ASTROLOGY, YOU’RE ACTUALLY JUST A HUGE BITCH

thefatjewish

SO MANY PEOPLE WORKING ON A “CLEAN EATING PLAN” RIGHT NOW THAT WILL LAST EXACTLY 27 DAYS

thefatjewish

AM I DOING THIS RIGHT? @emrata

parishilton

#SnowBunnies in #Aspen. ❄️🐰🐰❄️

thefatjewish

SOME PEOPLE ARE AT WORK SOME PEOPLE ARE IN CABO SOME PEOPLE ARE DRUNK AT WORK, IT’S SO FUCKING CONFUSING WHAT ARE WE DOING

thefatjewish

I5 FUCKING PLANE TICKETS FROM CHICAGO TO PARIS, 10 PIZZAS, HOME ALONE DAD WAS BALLLLLINGGGGGGGG

parishilton

Thank you to my amazing friends & family who came to support me at the premiere of my new film #TheAmericanMeme at @Netflix. Love you all! 😍

thefatjewish

Not all heroes wear capes. Some are Armenian midgets who are slightly under the weather. ( @boujeeslut)

thefatjewish

So many $9 iced matchas, so little fucking income.

thefatjewish

“Grandpa, I’m a social media disruption specialist for a multi vertical gender fluid dating app!” said the 26 year old girl at Thanksgiving dinner to her grandfather who lost his hand in Korea and thinks Hillary Clinton worships Satan, who nods approvingly, yet is deeply confused and upset. ( @broazay)

thefatjewish

“White people love snitching so much, they invented yelp” - @desusnice

thefatjewish

HOLY FUCK THIS CANNOT BE UNSEEN ( @pizzaslime)

thefatjewish

THIS AIRPLANE PILOT IS VERY FUCKING GOOD AT HALLOWEEN

THEFATJEWISH

Wait, am I washed up because I’m worried that he’s ruining a cast iron pan with that sponge and the soap?? I NEED TO GO GET BLACKOUT DRUNK IMMEDIATELY AND RECLAIM MY FUCKING YOUTH.

parishilton

Happy Birthday @ChristinaMilian! 🎈🎂🎈So many fun memories & fashion moments together over the years. Sending you so much love on your special day beautiful #BirthdayGirl! 🤗

thefatjewish

I WISH I WAS IN MYKONOS WITH LINDSAY LOHAN WATCHING HER DANCE ON ECSTASY IN A SILK ROMPER, IS THAT TOO MUCH TO FUCKING ASK?

thefatjewish

Heyyyyyyy Russia, can you please stop trying to politically puppeteer us and maybe use all your teen hackers for some shit that we’d all actually be into? K THANKS BYEEEEE ( @samaranieves)

parishilton

Love these photos I shot last year with the incredibly talented @BrendanForbes. 🔥 #iconic 👑

thefatjewish

One time I had unprotected sex with a white woman with dreadlocks who was a vegan, and she took a shit in my bathroom that literally smelled like a corpse filled with cabbage. Burned my eyes when I walked in there.

thefatjewish

The first guy to discover milk probably did a lot of other weird shit.

thefatjewish

I’m not gay, but fucking Joe Biden would be patriotic, right?

thefatjewish

Never fucking forget. #9/11

parishilton

My #MCM 🔥 So proud to be with you here at The Toronoto Film Festival for the premiere of your new film #TheDeathAndLifeOfJohnFDonovan directed by @XavierDolan. Love you handsome 😍

parishilton

Backstage at @TheBlondsNY #DisneyVillainsXTheBlonds runway show. 🔥 #NYFW

parishilton

Beautiful evening at the #BazaarIcons party. 👑 #NYFW

parishilton

invented by me

parishilton

Trying to decide which @PamellaRolland dress to wear to the @HarpersBazaarUS #IconsBall tonight. Which is your favorite? 😍 #NYFW

parishilton

We ❤️ #Monse ✨ #NYFW

parishilton

Rocking @_Namilia_ 🔥

parishilton

Happy Birthday @BrittanyFurlan 🎈🎂🎈 Wishing you lots of love on your special day! Thanks for always putting a smile on my face you beautiful funny babe! ❤️

Laudyacynthiabella

Laudyacynthiabella

Assalamualaikum teman-teman! Jangan lupa,hari ini di @shopee_id ada Super Grand Prize Day ya. Dapetin Dobel Golden Ticket dengan belanja di Shopee, dan dapetin kesempatan menangin Samsung S9+ yang diundi hari ini😉 • • Selain itu, kamu juga bisa belanja produk dari brand favorite kamu dengan diskon up to 99%. Jangan lupa pake kode voucher aku: SHOPEELCB, dan dapetin cashback 50% hingga 50rb Koin Shopee tanpa min. pembelian. • Eitsss, hari ini juga ada Goyang Shopee 3x Sehari lho, 9 Pagi, 5 Sore, dan 9 Malam. Yuk, undang temen-temen kamu untuk dapat bonus koin! Daaann kejutan lainnya, ada flash sale 9x juga lho hari ini! Ayooo, jangan sampe kehabisan :) • Untuk info lebih lanjut, langsung aja follow @shopee_id ya! • #ShopeeID #ShopeeID99 #SuperShoppingDay

Laudyacynthiabella

Anekaria 🍃🍃

parishilton

#BurningManMemories 🌈🦄🌈

thefatjewish

Some girls want flowers. Some want ridiculously expensive sushi. SOME JUST WANT TO WANDER AROUND COSTCO SCARFING FREE SAMPLES @hinge

Laudyacynthiabella

Hi Lgirls Malaysia, Selamat Hari Kemerdekaan Malaysia! I have a good news that the discount is still available. Enjoy the 31% off from @lbylcb @mylbylcb for all items except LBrooch and Geulis Series. Only available until tomorrow 31st august • • Semoga dapat menjadi bangsa yang hidup dalam harmoni, seiya sekata, bersatu padu dan kasih sayang terhadap negara. 😊

thefatjewish

I’m sure this comment section is going to be super fun and reasonable!

Laudyacynthiabella

Kemarin selesei kerja langsung dinner sama titiiwww!! MashAllah seneng banget. Terlalu lama ga duduk berdua sambil cerita-cerita😥 Jadi kita punya kebiasaan yang kita lakuin kalau lagi ketemu,Kita tulis wish kita di note. Terakhir kita tulis waktu lagi liburan ber2. Dan Alhamulilah apa yang kita tulis sudah terwujud. Allah maha baik🙏🏼😊 • • Semoga yang kita tulis tadi malem di ijabah Allah ya tiw🍃 LOVE U titiwwwwwww.. • • Ps: aku pake lipstik kamalia loh.. makasih ya tiw @kamaliabeauty nyaa☺️🍃 & aku pake top dari @wanda_haraa . Thanks ya pooh❤️

Laudyacynthiabella

lunch bareng @zaskiasungkar15 @shireensungkar !! Sekarang Bella sungkar pulang dulu yaaaa🤪☺️ Masih kangen kalian loh🍂🍂🍂

Laudyacynthiabella

Ditemenin mereka🖤 #sayang🍃🍃

Laudyacynthiabella

🍃Beki🖤

Laudyacynthiabella

🍂🍂🍃

Laudyacynthiabella

Kembali ke pelukan nya @zaskiasungkar15 😘☺️ #BEKI🖤

parishilton

Happy #NationalDogDay to all the dogs & dogs lovers today! Thank you for bringing so much love into all of our lives! 😍🐶

parishilton

Happy Birthday @SofiaRichie! 🎈🎂🎈I’ve known you since you were born & I’m so proud of the woman you have become. So many amazing memories together! 👯‍♀️ You are so beautiful both inside & out. Love you sis😍

thefatjewish

ALSO, IF YOU GAVE IT SUNGLASSES I FUCKSSSSS WITH YOU. IF YOU PUT IT IN THE CENTER YOU’RE A COMPLETE AND TOTAL PSYCHO.

laudyacynthiabella

#acropolis

laudyacynthiabella

#sholateidadha ☺️

laudyacynthiabella

Allahu Akbar 3x Walillahilham. • • Selamat hari Raya Idul Adha. Semoga ALLAH melimpahkan cinta Nabi Ibrahim AS kepada ALLAH kedalam diri kita sampai akhir hayat kita. Dan kita tau banyak cara menuju mulia Bisa jadi kurban salah satunya Alhamduliah bagi kita yang sudah menyisihkan rezeqi untuk berbagi bersama Semoga kita berkah yaaa❤️ Selamat Idul Adha.. mohon maaf lahir & batin 🙏🏼 #whenincappadocia

laudyacynthiabella

Hanya Allah yang dapat membuat yang tidak mungkin menjadi mungkin 🍂🍃

thefatjewish

Remember when the world was supposed to end in 2012? What happened to that? WHO FUCKED THAT UP

laudyacynthiabella

#whensunsetsdown🌅

laudyacynthiabella

Jadi yaaa..di foto ini aku pakai L hijab yang series geulis motif batik. Terus waktu aku mau bikin series ini,niat nya untuk ngerayain 73thn indonesia. Dan Alhamdulilah,3 hari yang lalu aku di undang kbri untuk ngerayain 17agustus. Jadi aku bisa ngerayain pakai hijab karya ku. Horeeeee💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻 #ceritasambiljualan #yukhijabnyakaka #Lmotifbatik #Lgeulis

laudyacynthiabella

#ootDirgahayu 🇲🇨 Tadi malam pengalaman pertama aku merayakan kemerdekaan di malaysia.. mashAllah seneng nyaa. Makasih ya suami udah nememin🙏🏼❤️🇲🇨 #73thindonesiamerdeka . . Lace outer by @lacebyartkea @wanda_haraa 😊

ParisHilton

Happy Birthday Dad! 🎈🎂🎈 Thank you for being such an incredibly supportive father & mentor to me. I love & look up to you so much. I wouldn’t be the business woman today if it weren’t for you inspiring me & instilling that work ethic in me. Thank you for always being there for me. You are the best dad, I love you ❤️

laudyacynthiabella

L ❤️

laudyacynthiabella

🍂🍂

laudyacynthiabella

Pose lagi mikir new vlog mau bahas apa yaaa 🤔 Naaahh.. Biar seru aku buka QnA yaaa.kalian bisa comment di #LCBChannel di first video, Atau comment dibawah ini yah👇👇👇 • • dan bisa request video content apa untuk new vlog aku nanti! • • Ps (jangan comment aja.. subscribe jugaa yaa guys😬)

parishilton

Epic night at #METALMANIA with @SebastianFaena @CarineRoitfeld @JuliaRestoinRoitfeld. 🔥 #Ibiza

parishilton

#Metalmania with my bae @Marylan

thefatjewish

2022: EVERYONE IS AN INFLUENCER (THOSE WITH UNDER 100 FOLLOWERS ARE REFERRED TO AS “NANO INFLUENCERS”), BUT NOBODY CAN CHANGE A FUCKING TIRE.

parishilton

If you’re looking to buy or sell a home be sure to reach out to @HiltonHyland’s newest #PowerCouple @BarronHilton & @TessaHiltonOfficial!

parishilton

Congratulations to my love on an epic & successful art exhibit opening! Thank you to all our amazing friends for coming to support. So happy & proud of you babe! 😍🎨 #Ibiza

ParisHilton

Reunited in #Ibiza with my babe @LottieMossXO. 🔥👯‍♀️🔥

ParisHilton

Happy Birthday @DevonAoki! Sending you lots of love & well wishes on your special day beautiful! 🎈🎂🎈

ParisHilton

Touring around the world like a true #Boss. 👑 Love all my fans so much! 💕

ParisHilton

Great seeing you last night @SteveAngello. Such an Epic show! 🙌 #Ibiza #GoodVibesOnly ❤️🎵

ParisHilton

Love my @Guess campaign. 📸 by @EllenVonUnwerth 👸🏼🐱 #GuessGirl 👑 #NationalCatDay

parishilton

Last night was #Lit! 🎉🎶👸🏼🎶🎉

parishilton

Jetting off to #LasVegas with my #Squad for @ParisHiltonSkincare. 💕 @PatrickStarrr @LarisaDoll @Guy_Tang 💕 #JETLUXlife

parishilton

#JetSetLife 💕👑✈️💕

parishilton

So proud of my Perfume Empire! 👑 I cant believe I’ve released 24 @ParisHiltonFragrances so far! #BossBabe 💖 #QueenOfPerfumes 👸🏼

parishilton

So proud of my love @ChrisZylkaArt. Can’t wait for his art Exhibit opening in #Ibiza on August 9th at @PikesHotel. 🎨 #ChrisZylkaArt ⚡️

parishilton

So proud & excited to be at my inauguration to be honored with the title of Ambassador of #Ibiza. ✨👸🏼✨

parishilton

#Mood after #Vegas this weekend. #SleepingBeauty 👸🏼 #TiredAF 😴 📸by @Camraface

parishilton

Life is truly a reflection of what we allow ourselves to see and be... ✨❤️✨

parishilton

Be fearless in the pursuit of what sets your soul on fire...🔥

parishilton

#Mood 💋

parishilton

#BossBabe 👑

parishilton

#AutographGoals 😍 @LouisVuitton

parishilton

✨💃🏼✨ So proud & excited about my new @ParisHiltonSkincare Line. A product line that really works with incredible results! 😍 #FirstClassSkincare #AntiAging #QueenOfSkincare 👑

laudyacynthiabella

MashAllah❤️ Selamat ya sayang semoga ilmu nya bermanfaat bagi banyak orang.sukses yaa dijah💐💋

laudyacynthiabella

❤️

laudyacynthiabella

Moms 😉

laudyacynthiabella

Fun with my favorite kiddos❤️

laudyacynthiabella

Bebelly time😉 Moment nya pas banget,lagi kumpul-kumpul.. terus di rumah ada @bebellybakery ! Anak-anak super happy😉 #bebellybakery #melekatmanisdihati

laudyacynthiabella

Tante fit.. semoga doa-doa nya di ijabah Allah yaa🙏🏼❤️ #minus5orang😎 #anekaria

laudyacynthiabella

Dari semua hasil foto yang focus cuma ini,walaupun ada yang belum senyum,ada yg merem. Gpp yaaaa.. Yang penting tujuan kita sama🤪😉 #mygirls #anekaria

thefatjewish

SHOUT OUT TO EVERYONE IN TAMPA WITH A HORRENDOUS LEG TATTOO WHO DOESN’T HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH THEIR DAD

laudyacynthiabella

Silaturahmi sama panda🐼🐼😉

thefatjewish

Hey guys, just a quick reminder that Blue Ivy’s life is sooooo much fucking better than yours. Have a great night peasants!

parishilton

Queens since day one. ✨👸🏼👸🏼✨

parishilton

So in love with my beautiful lil angel Lily-Grace. 😍👶🏼 #AuntParis

parishilton

#BabyParis 👶🏼

parishilton

Amazing time DJ’ing & walking the runway for @TezenisOfficial 🔥 #ThatsHot 👸🏼 #TezenisClub

laudyacynthiabella

Alhamdulilaaah akhirnya bisa ketawa2,chit-chat lagi sama teteh fica & princess tasha😉 #silaturahmiituindah

laudyacynthiabella

Kamu masih penasaran gimana cara konsumsi Charmes White Secret supaya lebih maksimal hasilnya, mudah kok.. yuuk ikuti langkah berikut ini : • • 1. konsumsi 2x sehari, 1 sendok setelah bagun pagi, dan 1 sendok lagi sebelum tidur malam 2. Larutkan 1 sendok serbuk Charmes White Secret ke dalam air mineral dan aduk sampai rata. 3. Minum segelas air larutan Charmes White Secret, dan siap untuk rasakan perubahan kulit cantik bercahaya. • • Easy & simple kan… So kamu yang penasaran belum coba keajaiban Charmes White Secret, yuk follow dan order di @charmesofficial. #charmeswhitesecret

laudyacynthiabella

Halloooo tante-tante yang suka online shopping.. tau ga,sekarang mami shireen,mami kia,bunda bella punya olshop preloved loh.. check ya sist IG kita. Hehehehehhe namanya @bekishi_preloved tante.. happy shopping ya tante-tante👠👛👜👚👟🕶

PARISHILTON

✨GIVEAWAY✨ WIN 2 VIP tickets to party with ME Saturday, July 28th @ Hakkasan - MGM Grand hotel in Las Vegas! 💗 All you have to do is: 1. Follow @AIAawards & @ParisHiltonSkincare on IG 2. Tag 3 friends in the comments below👇🏼 3. That's it! Ends Thursday @ 8am PST. Winner will be announced Thursday at 9am PST. Good luck babes! 💋

PARISHILTON

Slaying the decks & runway for @TezenisOfficial. ✨✨👸🏼✨✨ #Tezenishow #TezenisClub #ParisHilton

PARISHILTON

#Mood ✨✨🧚🏼‍♀️✨✨

PARISHILTON

Trying to decide which swimsuit to wear in #Ibiza today. I love them all! 😍👙 Which one is your favorite? 🔥

laudyacynthiabella

Photo 1 : tadi malem dateng ke wedding with suami❤️ Swipe——> Photo 2,3,4 : 📸 by suami 😅 niat foto nya mau keliatan kurus dan tinggi Eh yang ada malah ketawa-ketawa😅alhasil foto yang di posting super apa ada nyaaa ✌🏾 Btw,aku mau kasih info kalau tadi malem aku pake baju melayu by @renzilazuardi Terus stylist nya @wanda_haraa ! Abis ini berdoa semoga suami sabar kalau di minta tolong foto 😎

parishilton

Happy Birthday @SelenaGomez 🎂Wishing the best on your special day beautiful #BirthdayGirl 🎈👸🏻🎈

parishilton

Back on my magical island #Ibiza rocking my new #ParisHiltonXBoohoo dress. 🔥💛🔥

parishilton

#Mood 😎 #BabyParis

thefatjewish

I’ve been drinking rosé since 10:30, should I start drunk dialing celebrities I have in my phone? MICHAEL B JORDAN I’M SORRY IN ADVANCE DUDE

thefatjewish

People my age are having children on purpose and I still haven’t unpacked from a trip I took to Ibiza in fucking March. I got a UTI on that trip. ( @thekayanova)

thefatjewish

Kylie Jenner was on the cover of Forbes Magazine today for having a net worth of 900 million dollars, which is heartbreaking. I don't want to live in a world where Kylie Jenner doesn't have a billion dollars. WE MUST RAISE 100 MILLION DOLLARS TO HELP HER GET TO A BILLION, PLEASE SPREAD THE WORD, THIS IS EXTREMELY IMPORTANT. LINK IN BIO TO DONATE.

thefatjewish

Asians are soooooo future.

thefatjewish

TAYLOR SWIFT IS THE GIRL IN SCHOOL WITH ONE SUPER LONG BRAID WHO IS DEEPLY OBSESSED WITH HORSES AND HAS HORSE STICKERS ALL OVER HER BINDER

thefatjewish

It’s hotter than Djimon Hansou wearing a Montcler jacket in a sauna out there, people.

thefatjewish

I don’t care if you’re a Reddit shitposting anarchist knife enthusiast who believes Hillary Clinton is a reptile, EVERYONE SHOULD BE DOING THIS ( @doughbvy)

thefatjewish

And I never encountered quicksand, which I was told would be an issue, plus nobody ever tried luring me into a van for “free candy”. I WAS A HUSKY CHILD WHAT THE FUCK PEDOS?? ( @melecevida)

thefatjewish

I PUT DESIGNER DRUGS IN MY BUTT 2 WEEKS AGO IN LAS VEGAS AND I’M STILL NOT FEELING OK. DON’T GROW UP, IT’S A TRAP.