I’ve always been a stickler when it comes to routines. Even over summer we have worked hard to stick to our 7pm bed time. It isn’t always easy and sometimes doesn’t happen, but I find sticking to a bed time routine beneficial. My kids thrive off our daily routine, they always have. I think there is so much value in consistency. Ever since they were babies their bed time routine has stayed the same: dinner, bath, and bed. • With the kids and Ry getting back to school I know it is incredibly important to stick tight to our sleep routine (even for Ry and I). Sleep is a necessity in order to simply function better and feel good. • Do you have a consistent sleep routine? If so, what does it look like and how do you find it helpful? • I’m teaming up with @knowyourotcs to encourage you to implement consistent sleep routines in your home for positive outcomes such as improved attention, improves behavior, and improved emotional regulation. Ive seen the positive impact this has on our family too!! • Over the weekend the kids turned 4. They went to bed nearly two hours passed their bed time Saturday night and we all paid for it the next day😭! I’m sure many of us have been there before🤦🏻♀️? @aasmorg recommends a child from 3-5 years sleeps 10-13 hours per 24 hours, which is what our aim is for the triplets 🙌🏻💕 • @healthychildrenaap also recommends that all screen time be turned off 30 minutes to 1-2 hours before bed time!! The light from our devices can impede natural hormones that help us fall asleep!! Note taken—for all of us (kids and parents)😂 This is something I am working on as well!! • Sleep is vital for all of us. And having a consistent sleep schedule for your kids (and ourselves) is beneficial for the whole family! Just like you may see in yourself, lack of sleep in kids can really affect how they feel, act, and function. • Lastly, I want to remind you NOT to give your child OTC medications to make them sleep! I know sleep patterns and sleep struggles can be a lot at times but OTC meds should be used for the symptoms they’re presenting not as a sleep aid. • #knowyourotcs
In ONE word describe your typical family grocery shopping experience? #ralphspartner • My shopping experiences are usually chaos, pure chaos. EVERY SINGLE TIME. Someone is always begging for toys or needs candy😂!! And every now and then we have a melt down on aisle 9🤯😂. The worst is when I’m ready to go conquer grocery shopping and forget my wallet!! • However, I’m excited to share Kroger Pay makes things a little bit easier. @ralphsgrocery now has Kroger Pay and it is a game changer, especially for those of us who tend to forget our wallet or purse! Once you download the @ralphsgrocery app, set up your payment card for a fast and safe way to check out!! Easy as that!! Grocery shopping may still be nuts, but Kroger Pay simplifies your shopping experience 🙌🏻💕 #lovemyralphs
Have you ever had a moment where you knew you needed your mom tribe? Your best friend? Someone who could support you and be with you whether it was one of the best or most terrifying moments as a Mom? • Being a Mother comes with so many ups and downs and it is incredibly important for us to have community, a support system. It is vital for us to stay connected to a group like this, which is why I love using a reliable cell phone service like @totalwireless. My season of Postpartum and Depression was very isolating and I have learned the incredible value of being able to connect with my hubby or close friends when I start to experience the onset of a panic attack. Even this summer I connected with a group of close friends in a group text in the midst of a panic attack I was having at Sea World of all places. I was in Shark Encounter and my mind spiraled into believing the glass was going to break and the triplets would either drown or get eaten by sharks. I wouldn't be able to save them. • So unrealistic. • I ended up reaching out to my Mom tribe. Despite how irrational I sounded, they loved on me and encouraged me to leave. They supported me and helped me in a time of dire need. And none of them even live in my state. A mom tribe is necessary, and so is a trustworthy wireless service like @totalwireless to stay in touch with them. With great plans and reliable coverage on the largest, most dependable 4G LTE network, Total Wireless helps you stay connected with the people you need the most, your support system! • Total Wireless has partnered with PEOPLE magazine to spotlight inspiring stories of confidence and courage! Submit your story for a chance to be featured in a sponsored post on PEOPLE.com—check out my latest blog post and my stories for the link. #ad #totalwireless
Do you ever really run into @target and only buy one thing???😂 I was so excited to get the best smelling @poopourri 💩💕 for our bathroom @target 🙌🏻 There is a whole lot of poop in our home 😂💩🤦🏻♀️ and basically @poopourri is a necessity! The citrus smell is amazing and transforms the bathroom experiences in our home, especially if your are using the kids bathroom😂🙌 • @target is my saving grace, my mom vacation, my favorite place to shop and be alone! 😂 It also has everything you need! #poopourri #ad #target
“What were you not prepared for in your postpartum?” • @generation.mom nominated me to answer this question. My short answer is EVERYTHING 😂 • From the moment the triplets were born I was challenged and faced with adversity. The complications following my c-section were a bit of a roller coaster and brought on an array of unprepared emotions and physical pain. Having to wait a full day to meet my babies was something I was not prepared for. And even though we knew the babies would be in the NICU, nothing can really prepare you for the moment you walk out of the hospital without your babies. I knew they were in the best hands, but my heart ached and I cried so hard on the drive home. • I’m not sure how prepared you can really be for becoming a new mother especially when it comes to adjusting to life with 3 newborns. The sleepless nights, the 15 days we spent in the NICU, the overwhelming shame because I hated breastfeeding, the GERD—all of it was so hard! Not to mention my postpartum body was a new me that I had to learn to appreciate and love! • Postpartum is a season of Motherhood that maybe some are prepared for, but not me. I got hit pretty hard, but I can look back and see how I grown as a Mother. My postpartum season molded me into the mama I am today. The uncertainty and lack of confidence ironically gave me confidence in knowing that most of Motherhood is not having a clue what you’re doing 🤷♀️💕 and I think there is so much beauty in that! • Would love for you to share your stories and tag @generation.mom 💕 In the meantime I now nominate @denupzter @triplets_of_copenhagen @chrissyjpowers
Today we took the kids to my favorite theme park growing up @knottsberryfarm 🙌🏻💕 We spent the day with Ryan’s twin sis and her family and the day was perfect: full of fun, memories, and meltdowns!! 😂🙌🏻🤦🏻♀️ I even burst up some courage to go on the wildest most terrifying roller coaster worth my bro-in-law😂 (see my stories) It went upside down 6 times 🤯😥 and had NO chest harness and it was AMAZING😂🙌🏻💕 • We also couldn’t have gotten through the day without @keenzstrollerwagons 🙌🏻💕 I wish they made one for adults too😜🤣 #knottsberryfarm
So crazy to think this was me FOUR years ago. I had 6 more days to go to meet our goal date: 34 weeks 1 day. I prayed so hard that God would help me get there and He did. My doctor even told me I could go a few more days, but I was ready to meet my babies. Plus, the overwhelming physicality of carrying 3 babies was a lot on me and my body was tired. I look at my body and am blown away that 15 pounds of babies were in there 😂😂💕 What a journey. • Every year when we celebrate the triplets birthday I get pretty nostalgic about my journey to Motherhood, the moments I finally became a Mom, and how insanely fast the last 4 years of been. My heart beams for joy and ugly cries thinking about them going to kindergarten in a year. So many emotions about my babies growing up far too fast💕 • And of course, an itch for another baby, just ONE🤦🏻♀️💕🥰🤷♀️
Friday Feels💕🙌🏻🦄 • Let’s remind those mamas in our life the difference they’re making!! Being a Mom isn’t easy and surrounding yourself with people who love you, support you, believe in you, and help you recover 500+ videos you deleted off your iPhone is vital! Love you @chasingmcallisters 💕 • Tag your mama friends and happy feel Good Friday!!! Tees: @themomculture
In an effort to raise awareness that WE have so much more to our story than the number of likes you see, pretty houses, and adorable kids- we are sharing our real stories #morethanthisapp • Here is my REAL moment of the week: • Two nights ago my daughter wanted to sleep in our bed. We usually only allow the kids in our bed when they’re sick. I told her I could set up a bed on the floor. • About an hour later she woke up again in my bed and once again I told her she could sleep on the floor next to me. When she got down she managed to hit her mouth on the nightstand but I had NO idea. She was sobbing and I just held her while she cried. It was the middle of the night. I was half dead 🤦🏻♀️ and honestly just wanted to sleep. I look back and wish I had more empathy and turned on the light to check on her, but instead I just held her until she calmed down. She never mentioned her mouth hurt. I checked on her about 5 minutes after she got settled and she seemed to be okay. • The next morning I woke up and it was business as usual... milk for the boys, cereal for Charlize. I went to brush my teeth and realized I had a large circle of dry blood on my chest 😳 and I was so CONFUSED 😂🤦🏻♀️ I thought I had a bloody nose, but couldn’t figure out where all the blood came from... Eventually, everything clicked in my mind and I asked Charlize where she hurt herself in the night.😳 • Instantly, I felt like the worlds worst mom!! Ugh. I started to freak out and was worried she needed stitches. We took her to the Doctor and she also saw her Dentist @sunnysmileskids today. Fortunately, they both came to the same conclusion that this was the best kind of trauma that could have happened and it is possible that she may also have to have the other tooth pulled in addition to the one that is already infected, but only time will tell. • I am thankful that overall this was a good outcome. I am proud of my brave girl. But I still feel pretty bad about what happened... but I also know this is Motherhood and we do the very best we can 💕 • Use #morethanthisapp to share your REAL moments 🙌 thank you @citygirlgonemom for encouraging us to share the REAL us 💕
Yesterday in church, I wondered “what would we do if someone started shooting?” Where were the exits? How would I protect my kids? I hate that my mind was in a place of fear in church of all places... I could feel my heart racing. The only thing I knew to do in the moment was lift my hands and pray. And ask God to calm my heart and give my fears and my worries to Him. • He has never left us, yet many times we feel abandoned by Him wondering where He is in the midst of all this darkness. • My heart grieves for the families who lost their loved ones, for the crisis our nation is in, and the fears many of us have about normal day to day things. • FEAR can be crippling. And many of us are walking in that fear. • Fear to go to the store. To the movies. To a concert. To school. To church. • There will always be evil and darkness as long as we are on this earth. But there will also always be light. We can choose to love. We can choose to trust Him in our fears, loss, and pain. We can lay our hearts and burdens before him and trust what He is doing. He has not abandoned us. And He is always with us, always. • I will daily choose to release my fears and trust God. He is the light. He is goodness. He is our comforter. And in a world of so much pain, tragedy, and loss-I will cling to Him. I will trust Him. I will pray for wisdom, direction, and answers for our nation. I will pray for unity. I will declare God’s peace over every person stepping foot into a normal day activity with fear. I will lift up the families of those affected by the tragedies in our nation and ask God to comfort their grieving hearts in a time of pain and loss. And I will continue to trust Him and not allow the enemy to speak fears into my own heart about normal day things because He is love. He is peace. He is comfort. 🙏🏻💕
When I found out I was pregnant with triplets I had extremely low expectations of breastfeeding and I was completely okay with that. I knew it would likely be hard to breastfeed 3 at once and I felt like not going into my journey with a specific idea in mind of solely breastfeeding would be helpful so I wouldn’t be disappointed if I couldn’t breastfeed. However, I had some major complications after the triplets were born and my doctor told me I likely wouldn’t be able to breastfeed. I wasn’t too upset about it because my expectations to breastfeed three babies at one time were already low. • BUT THEN, a miracle happened. My body started producing enough my milk for my 3 babies and then some. I couldn’t believe it and was so happy to see my body working despite what the doctors expected. My breastfeeding expectations quickly changed. I felt like all the milk coming in was truly a miracle and was suddenly DRIVEN to breastfeed. • This photo was the first time I tandem fed the babies. I was so proud of myself. It’s also the only photo I have of me nursing, which kind of bums me out. • My breastfeeding journey is one I am proud of, but it is also one I despised. I didn’t experience the “bond” I often heard of and I believe it didn’t help my postpartum depression 😢 There was so much milk. Often when I think about my breastfeeding journey it makes me cringe. But this photo reminds me to celebrate what my body did and be proud of the 3 months I stuck with it. I have often struggled to celebrate my breastfeeding journey because of the shame I felt because it ultimately was something I didn’t enjoy and for my decision to stop breastfeeding. The guilt was expounding 😢However, I no longer carry that shame and know that it was the best decision for me and my family. I also know I am so proud of my breastfeeding journey 🙌🏻💕 • Happy Breastfeeding Awareness week!
True or False: • Some mornings call for otter pops 🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️ • Mat: @gathre 💯 true!! #iamthiskindofmom
So many feelings in one photo😂💕🙌🏻 We jumped right back into the swing of things after our mini staycation. Loving our summer pool days. The kids have made so much progress swimming in the pool. They don’t wear their puddle jumpers at all in the water!!🙌🏻🦄 • Ponchos: @pendletonwm
Ry and I had an amazing staycation the @grandecolonialhotel the last couple of days! We stayed there years ago and it was so nice to be back and enjoy the beautiful ocean and sea breeze KID FREE💕 La Jolla has always been a really special place to me because Ryan proposed there almost 11 years ago! 💍 We don’t get away too often, but when we do it reminds me how important it really is. We also enjoyed an incredible dinner @ninetenlajolla 😍 Great food, great conversation, and great company. We talked about making out oN the beach after our @ninetenlajolla dinner, but we both knew the only thing that was going to happen was loose sweatpants and a good movie 😂🤦🏻♀️💕 • When was the last time you had a kid free getaway???
GIVEAWAY!!! 🛴 🛴 🛴 The triplets are cruising in their @yvolution.world scooters! They LOVE them and we are so excited to be teaming up with @yvolution.world for 5 lucky people to WIN 5️⃣ @yvolution.world Gilder XL deluxe scooters and wristband and beam light accessories just in time for back to school season!!!! 🙌🏻 • To enter: 1️⃣ Like this photo 2️⃣ Follow @yvolution.world and @theperfectmom 3️⃣ Tag your friends #yvolutionfamily • Suits: @hugolovestiki Shoes: @striderite
“Just wear the suit!!” - @lipglossandcrayons Find a suit you feel good in (it may or may not have crotch snaps😂😂😂-you’ll understand if you saw my swim suit review from yesterday’s post)!! • Put it on and own it girl, because there is so much BEAUTY in you!!! • #justwearthesuit Towel: @pendletonwm
Lets get glamorous and talk about digestive issues? Basically, there is only one one way to talk about my poop schedule and that is in a pretty yellow dress with my favorite earrings. 😂🤷♀️ • Ry and I are polar opposite when it comes to our digestive tracks. He has a sensitive stomach and is allergic to dairy. He tends to be running to the bathroom often, while I (TMI when it comes to my gut, but just laying it all out there for you) tend to get constipated so easily. I have told Ry often, I would rather be running to the bathroom every few hours than be constipated for days. • For me, especially when I am on vacation or simply not at home for a full day, I will get "shy bowels," as I call them. I can't be alone in this? It is incredibly uncomfortable and has become something that even brings me anxiety. • For the most part, I eat pretty healthy, and do my best to take in foods that help my body digest well, but my body still struggles. However, when I started taking @nbpure MagO7 I noticed such a change. It helps me feel better and creates a healthy balanced gut. MagO7 is made to remove intestinal debris and is helpful in simply breaking down intestinal build up. If you are seeking something to help your digestion and have better health and wellness use my code for your purchase. • Code: desiree15 for 15% off #healthandwellness #nbpure
So I just bought this bathing suit online and have to share my swimsuit fail review with you! • 1️⃣. WHY would a swimsuit button at the crotch?! One wrong move and it’s a free show for everyone 🤦🏻♀️ No... just no 🤣Obviously I didn’t realize it was a bodysuit swimsuit when I ordered it 😂🤯 • 2️⃣ I don’t recommend a one piece that snaps in the crotch area because it is so uncomfortable! Like wedgie in my vagina 🙈🤯🤦🏻♀️ Maybe this is a new trend though? I don’t know 🤷♀️ • 3️⃣ I’m not sure I understand the cheeky swim suit look, but if you’re rocking it YOU GO GIRL😂💃 It certainly shows off my tan lines 🤦🏻♀️ But overall, it is a bit much bootie for me!! • 4. It actually looks cute from the front 😂. BUT the whole button in the crotch area is enough for me to PASS!! But if that’s you’re thing you might actually LOVE this suit. 🙌🏻😂🤦🏻♀️
“You’re f***ing miserable all the time.” The words someone told me when I was neck deep in my postpartum struggles. Words that weren’t supportive. Words that just made feel worse about how I was already feeling. • If you would have told me that just weeks after my babies were born I would experience postpartum depression I wouldn’t have believed you. I waited years to finally become a Mom, I didn’t think the “baby blues” would even be in my vocabulary. The truth is the postpartum blues, exhaustion, and the lack of confidence as a Mother can sneak into your life overnight and it is paralyzing. The fear of failing my kids, not knowing their needs, and the pure exhaustion through me into a battle with anxiety and depression. • The triplets had GERD and needed individual attention during feedings. I quickly became overwhelmed. My body became strictly a funnel for milk. There was no connection, no bond, just pumping and milk. • The support I longed for was hard to find. “I guess you prayed a little too hard” was what I was told 😭 • Three months into my postpartum I finally saw a Doctor. The bright, outgoing, confident me was gone. I was embarrassed, ashamed, and disappointed. • There are many things we thrive for as a Mom, but sometimes it’s just about surviving. I did what I needed to to get though my postpartum journey. This meant admitting I was struggling, seeing a doctor, and going on meds. It meant getting help with overnights and hiring a Mommy Helper. It meant throwing my pride out the window and saying “I cannot do this mom thing alone.” Little did I know it would take a full year before I could feel more like the me I once was. But truthfully, I will never be her again. I’m a better, stronger me. Anxiety and depression is hard, but I know how to help myself and cope more now. I know the value of leaning on others. I know I can’t do this without Jesus. And I am a damn good Mom. • This week I am teaming with @chrissyjpowers @generation.mom @dr.kellyvincent @lauren.stewart_dc to bring a voice to PPD/Anxiety, offer tips and tools, and encourage! You can follow along in our stories throughout the week. 💕
Decorating is such a process. I don’t feel confident in anything I do, but Ryan’s sister has been helping me so much and I am so proud of our living room progress! We still need blinds (the kids broke the ones that were there when we first moved in😳🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️) but it is coming together! I’ve been searching Facebook marketplace for a coffee table too and many walls in our home are still empty, but this room is starting to make me really happy 🙌🏻💕 • We also got @kichlerlighting lanterns which have been a nice touch to simple decor. They’re Bluetooth, as well! Great addition!! • Do you feel confident in your decorating skills?
Happy Friday #flashback
Happy 4th of July🇺🇸🎇!!! • Our family is loving our @madsencycles Bike!! Electric assisted 😉One of best things ever made 🙌🏻💕It was such a special surprise for the triplets ❤️ Making memories and soaking in moments!! Enjoy the fireworks 🎇🇺🇸
I’ve learned sometimes pampering myself as a Mom comes in the form of an in home spa day doing facials, nails, and showering alone 😂🤷♀️ While I love going out and treating myself, I have also learned treating myself and taking care of me at home is also fulfilling and makes me feel good. • I recently partnered with @vanityplanetstore and tried their Forever Young product. This amazing tool is like having a facial, but in your own home💃!! Forever Young uses your natural reaction to temperature changes to help you absorb products better and firm your completion. My favorite setting is the hot and sonic vibration mode. My skin feels rejuvenated. Use my code: theperfectmom to receive 75% off the Forever Young!! #ad #vanityplanetstore #vanityplanet
Is there an ugly part of you that has come out in your mom anger that has even scared you? Have you felt like a monster? Like you’re ruining your kids? The shame and guilt that comes with mom anger is expounding and really difficult to work through. I never even knew I could get so angry UNTIL I became a Mom. It was something I was unprepared for entering into Motherhood and have felt very isolated as I’ve tried hard to work through my mom anger: the roots of my anger, my emotional response to my kids, and managing and coping in those moments of anger. • As Mothers, many of us feel yelling at our kids doesn’t usually help an already overwhelming situation, nor does it make you less angry. Yet, many of us find ourselves there because of tantrums, sibling rivalry, poor listening, bad behavior, etc. I have found myself there more times than I would like to admit. I have felt like a monster. In many cases, I have lacked empathy and understanding for my toddlers. It sounds ridiculous really, but sometimes it is hard to let our children feel and express because sometimes it is so irrational. However, in there toddler minds it is devastating to not be able to sleep at grandma’s house, to have to leave the park when they don’t want, use a blue spoon instead of a red one, or even sit on the left side in the back of the van instead of the right 😳. We need to let our kids feel and learn how to let them feel without having an emotional response that can negatively impact them. • Time Grace Consistency Intention • I’ve shared this before, but these words are so profound: “Motherhood is molding us into incredible beings. It is not just us who are molding our children. And sometimes ALL the ugly needs to come out so we can confront what needs to change. It’s okay. Forgive yourself, apologize to them, tell them you love them, and next time try better and do better.” • If there is an ugly coming out of you, remember that we are human and molding as well on this journey of Motherhood. I am not a monster. You are not a monster. Instead of allowing shame and guilt to carry you, forgive yourself, LEARN how to respond and cope,and do better! #confessionsoftheangrymom
Delivery day 🙌🏻 Did you have family outside the delivery room awaiting baby’s arrival or no? • We had our immediate family come to the hospital. It was important and meant so much to me to have them there with us because I felt like we were all on a journey of hope awaiting our miracle babies. • Leading up to my c-section, I knew our family would possibly meet the babies before me. I knew I would have to go to recovery and the triplets would be taken to the NICU right away so I told Ry once he was allowed to bring family back to meet our babies, if I wasn’t out of recovery, to go ahead and let everyone have a chance to meet them! • It was a hard decision for me because I grieved, as their Mom, knowing that everyone else would likely meet them before me, but I knew everyone had so much love for these babies and I would eventually have my time with them, so I felt good about my decision. • Little did I know, I wouldn’t actually be able to meet my babies for a full day after their birth due to the complications following my c-section. But God knew and I’m thankful they were loved on by my family since I wasn’t able to. • I remember the morning after their delivery I struggled a lot because I wasn’t physically capable of getting to the NICU and even later that night it took everything to fight through the pain to simply get from my bed to my wheelchair. But I was determined to meet my babies. All day I had been taking swaddles from the NICU and wrapping them around me so the trio could be swaddled in my scent. I found comfort in that since I couldn’t be with them 😢 My younger sister even held and fed Sawyer and Charlize before I was able to. She was nervous she was overstepping but Ry told her “It’s either you or a stranger. I know Des would want you to.” Even though I know my babies were so well loved by our NICU nurses, having my sister feed and hold my babies while I couldn’t meant a lot to me💕. • Sometimes our birth experiences and even first moments with our babies don’t go as we planned or imagined. And in my case, I am thankful It didn’t take away from and of my first moments with my hope babies. 💕
Saturday’s are for sunshine and memories ❤️ Last night was the first night EVER where we only had one kid (Charlize). Sawyer was at my parents house and Jax was at my in-laws. It was really special to have a whole evening with just Charlize (not to mention it was night and day in terms of the usual dinner/bed time chaos 😂). She had a slumber party in our room and is convinced it’s where she will be sleeping permanently 😂 Happy weekend my friends!! Share your fun plans ⬇️⬇️⬇️ • The triplets are also enjoying their delicious pouches from @onceuponafarm 🙌🏻 They come in a variety of flavors and are yummmmy!! @onceuponafarm is the new homemade and offers fresh and nutritious foods for our babes all in a pouch!! It is amazing!! #farmmama #feedfresh #onceuponafarm
I learned awhile ago that my anxiety and anger were holding hands. The more anxious I would feel, the faster the anger would creep in and the panic attacks would hit. • Several weeks ago I took my kids to the swimming pool. I don’t go alone too often with them, but this time I did. The kids are in swim lessons, but don’t know how to swim on their own so since I was going alone I knew they would need to wear their puddle jumpers. The boys were playing together trying to get on a boogie board, while I played with Charlize. • Suddenly, my boys started arguing with each other (instant anxiety). And before I knew it they were trying to push each other under water. I got out of the water and ran to them. They were both screaming as I pulled them out. The puddle jumpers, of course brought them above water every time one pushed the other down, but it scared me and them every time they were forced under. In all honesty it brought back raw emotions from Charlize’s drowning. I was so angry. I jumped in the water and pulled them out. I held them hand in hand as they cried. My heart was beating so fast. “What is wrong with you? It is so dangerous to push each other under water. We are leaving!!!” I can’t say I handled the situation well. I was pissed and scared. It was a trigger for me and brought back raw emotions from Charlize’s accident. • Eventually, after we all calmed down, I was able to talk about why that behavior isn’t okay and how dangerous it can be to do something like that. I apologized for how I responded. And let them share what they were feeling too. But we still left the pool. • My anxiety has always held hands with my anger. It just took me time to realize how connected they were. I think it is important to understand your triggers and the roots to your own behavior. It helps you grow and change. I apply so many of the tools I’ve learned in therapy for my anxiety like my breathing techniques in moments of mom anger. Don’t give up Mama. You’re not alone in this season. • Time. Grace. Intention. Consistency. #confessionsoftheangrymom ——————— Tee: @charlotteandezra Head to @katiemcrenshaw @meg.boggs @thegarciadiaries
Years ago, I was diagnosed with hypothyroid. My mom and twin also have thyroid issues, so it wasn't really a surprise. #Ad I have been on thyroid medications for nearly 10 years now. As I became a Mother, I went on two other prescriptions for my anxiety: Lexapro and Xanax. It can be hard finding the right medications that not only work for you but are affordable. If I am being entirely honest, our family lives paycheck to paycheck and anytime we find a way to save on cost, it is really exciting, which is why I am so excited to tell you about @blinkhealth. #blinkhealth is an incredible app and website that will bring your prescription drug costs down dramatically. Both, my thyroid and anxiety medications dropped nearly in half of what I usually pay. This can make a huge difference financially as you pay what you see. The process is easy and you can pick up or have your prescription delivered. It is a win-win. @blinkhealth makes it so prescription medications are accessible for everyone. Blink Health isn’t insurance, but it’s a great alternative to save on the medications you need. The site is easy and FREE!I couldn't be happier and I am excited for you to try it out. Here is a coupon code: PERFECTMOM20 for $20 off your first prescription fill (Valid until 8/31/19). For many, this means your prescription is free!! Absolutely amazing! #BlinkHealthPartner
“Hope Anchors the Soul”. Hebrews 6:19 💕 Mama, we see you. We see the Mama that is waiting for her first baby, or struggling while she waits for the third. The path to Motherhood is different for all of us, and somethimes is a longer and more challenging path that expected. After my own struggles with infertility I have experienced the loneliness and isolation infertility can bring no matter where you are in your journey. I know the value of love and support. Walking through infertility is easier done with support, and we want you to know that we are here with you. 💕 I am excited to share that I am joining forces with @generation.mom to encourage those of you struggling with infertility and your waiting period. We would love to send a personal note to your mailbox! • Please drop a "HEART EMOJI" in the comments below, and check out the link in our profile to send us your info. The first 100 people who submit their mailing address via the link will receive a handwritten card in the mail from me, and @generation.mom ! Feel free to tag another Mama in the comments that needs some love as well! • We are looking forward to loving on you and encouraging you in the season of waiting that you’re in! #infertility #mamainwaiting
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Summer is here and it makes us feeling all kinds of happy (minus this gloomy weather we have been hit with here in SD). Our kids have always loved the water and being outdoors. On the blog today I am partnering with @knowyourotcs to share summer safety tips and how to be outdoor ready when it comes to first aid. . #linkinbio #knowyourotcs
Take me to the beach!! Are you off to any place incredible this summer?? We practically live in a great vacation spot and spend a lot of time at the beach and pool during the summer. We don’t have any getaways planned, but either way we will be making great family moments❤️ Happy Saturday friends!! We FINALLY got some sun here in San Diego ☀️ • And cooling off with some delicious and nutritious @drinksolti drinks 🙌🏻 • Suit: @limericki •This is the first time I’ve done a photo like this and I think it’s fun and creative 💕 hope it made it smile too! Inspired by: @happygreylucky
Someone asked me once “Why didn’t you even try to deliver them naturally?” • First, I didn’t have a choice. • Second, I had 3 babies at one time. Even if I had a choice, I would have chosen a c-section all day long. • Third: That question only made me feel like my delivery was somehow less than others who have given birth “naturally.” • My c-section wasn’t exactly a walk in the park. I experienced complications, almost died, needed blood transfusions, vaginal pack, and didn’t even get to hold my babies for 24 hours after their birth. My birth experience was traumatic, but I still feel like a pretty strong mama even though I did almost lose my life. • I wish the world could see that it doesn’t really matter how you deliver your baby. Yes, we all have a plan and hope to stick by our plan. Some have a vaginal birth with no meds, some go for the epidural (I know I would), some do a home birth, some have a scheduled c-section, and some have an emergency c-section, some have both. For some of us, our birth experience was remarkable. And for others, it was horrifying. However our babies come into this world, we need to unite and celebrate each other as Moms because it is the most incredible gift and there is no shame in how we birth our children. • We all have a birth story, an experience of how we delivered a babies and what that was like for us. As Moms, we all share a similar breath taking moment when we first welcome our baby into arms and hold them close. It is an undeniable feeling of love. It is a moment we always remember. Remember, Mama, there is no shame in your story💕 Share your birth experiences ⬇️⬇️ Undies: @kindredbravely • #this_is_postpartum #bravemomsunite #BraveMomAd #BeBravely #KindredBravely #Ad • Check out the Kindred Bravely website using my link bit.ly/ThePerfectMom and use discount code "PERFECT20" to receive 20% for those in the US
It’s not easy to say “I yelled at my child. I screamed. I made him cry. It scared him. It scared me.” You already feel like a monster for the rage but saying those words are humiliating and embarrassing-and more often than not makes you feel like your failing at your job as a Mother, but if we could only see the strength and courage it takes to say those words out loud and fight to change and respond differently perhaps we wouldn’t feel so lonely in the mom anger. • I think one of the biggest struggles about mom anger is how intensely isolating it is. No one talks about it, which only makes you feel like you are the only one really struggling with your emotional response to your kids. It feels like there is a stigma on mom anger because admitting that we struggle in how we respond to our kids and the anger that comes out of us can often be really shameful. This conversation is important that we have as Mothers. • In all honesty, mom anger is something I have been intentionally working on for quite some time now. I have experienced some pretty humiliating moments when it comes to my emotional response to my kids. One time my mom told me “”Just go. Take a break. You need a break.” It was true, but I felt so ashamed of myself. I’ve been in therapy for my anger and have worked on facing the roots of those emotions that come. I didn’t even realize I could get so angry and it is defeating at times. • But you know what is so liberating? Opening up about it! Creating a place so we can have the conversation and talk about how we grow and change. Choosing to have strength and bravery in admitting our faults and recognizing that we need to take steps forward to change, make this journey a little less isolating. Finding someone you can be open and honest with is vital. • Anytime I struggle with my mom anger I tell Ry. I need accountability, someone I feel safe with who will listen, encourage, and love me through those hard moments. Someone who may also tell me hard things, but encourage me to grow. I encourage you to find that someone, a place where you can share and be vulnerable with your heart and your struggles! #confessionsoftheangrymom
This was the very first photo I shared of my postpartum body after delivering my babies and it took me almost two years to share my new body in this space. I think learning to love and appreciate your postpartum body takes time and grace. It certainly did for me. I finally was in a place where I felt encouraged and inspired to celebrate my hope wounds. I wanted to honor my postpartum body and I decided to capture a postpartum body milk bath photo shoot and it is undoubtably one of the most beautiful and powerful things I have done to own, cherish, and celebrate my new body. • I wanted to honor my postpartum body, what it has been through, the strength and beauty behind the extra skin and stretch marks. It took time for me to truly see beauty in my new body and that’s okay. That’s called grace. It’s called intention. It’s actually taking the necessary time to look in the mirror and FIND the beauty because it is there. And that is exactly how my perspective changed! • There is power in sharing. Power in vulnerability. Power in honest conversation. #powerinpostpartum 💕 I hope you are encouraged today to know that you are BEAUTIFUL. Have grace for your postpartum body and practice changing your perspective. Find the beauty just like I did. And know that you aren’t alone wherever you are on your journey.
I love this picture so much. I hope they will always know how amazing it is to share in such a unique bond as triplets. And while some days are hard, full of fighting and bickering; there are also moments like this when they are adventuring and making memories together. • 📷: @focusedinphotography
“Congrats on your evolution, but I feel like they’re too big to be crying like little girls. A boy should be taught how to be strong by that age.” • Someone left this comment with me when I shared how Jax lost it in the car over his seating arrangement. Is your blood boiling? Because mine certainly is. 🤬🤯 There are so many problems with this statement. • I’m raising my sons (and daughter) to feel the heck out of their feelings, be emotional, and express themselves! I think allowing your child to express themselves is one of the most powerful things you can do for them. Let them feel and remind them you’re here for them when they calm down. In my case, that meant I had to wait ten minutes while my kid was kicking and screaming over his seating arrangement in the car before we could actually talk about his behavior and why he was upset. It was a massive tantrum indeed, but these are such teachable moments for everyone. • Teaching your child to have emotions is what makes them STRONG!!! It is what helps them become incredible men who can articulate and express themselves and gives them permission to cry, laugh, feel. It is so important for boys to understand that strength is not just found in how much you can lift or how big your biceps are! • My boys have HUGE feelings. They are loud, opinionated, and you will know when they aren’t happy. However, they need to be able to feel and let out their feelings just like we do as adults and it is our duty, as parents, to teach our kids that they are allowed to feel, weep, and cry and that there is so much STRENGTH in that! It builds character and teaches them how to deal with their emotions and understand their feelings. ❤️ • Rant over.
This was the first time Ry held all three babies at one time and it melts my heart every single time!! Happy Father’s Day @ryanscottfortin ❤️ There is truly no one like you!!
“You will have an unsuccessful triplet pregnancy.” #herbodycan • Little did that Doctor know, she couldn’t have been more wrong about what my body was capable of. • I remember when I found out I was pregnant with triplets I wasn’t sure how my 105 pound body was going to be able to do it, but I knew I would do everything I could to carry my babies as long as I could. • My body stretched and stretched. I had a cerclage at 14 weeks. I was on strict bed rest for 2 months. I made it to our goal date (34 weeks 1 day). My doctor even asked if I wanted to go a few more days, but I was ready. • My first doctor, the one who didn’t believe in my body and its strength, advised me to selectively reduce because she didn’t think my body could handle carrying 3 babies at one time. I was “too skinny, not tall enough, and had never given birth before.” She was wrong. • My body CAN. • While it wasn’t an easy journey carrying my babies, my body breathed a force of strength daily to be able carry my children. Not to mention, they were about 5lbs each at birth. I’m so glad I didn’t listen to that doctor. • I did experience some complications after my delivery. My doctor told me after my complications, all that blood loss, that I “likely wouldn’t be able to breastfeed.” However, my body proved her wrong. I could have fed my 3+. Amazing. • My body CAN. • It is truly remarkable what the female body is capable of. The ability to carry a child is remarkable. Behind every pregnant woman, is a fierce strength! And there is so much beauty in that! • Now, nearly 4 years postpartum, I can embrace my body in a way I have never been able to. I have a greater appreciation for self-love and can FIND beauty in my stretch marks and loose skin. I see strength in what my body can do! • My body CAN. • Thank you @katiemcrenshaw For starting #herbodycan 💕 Such an amazing movement!!
Several weeks ago we were sitting around the dinner table sharing our “highs and lows” of the day. Everyone was laughing. It felt like such a good meal conversation. It was Sawyer’s turn to share his high and low of the day. • “Alright buddy, you’re up.” • Without even taking time to think about it, he said in a firm and frustrated voice, “my low was mommy fighting at me. She yelled.” • It got quiet. Ry looked at me. Tears started to fill my eyes. Instantly I felt ashamed. Anytime I respond poorly to my kids I feel shame and guilt, but hearing Sawyer share made me feel so awful about myself! I was embarrassed as we encouraged him to express himself so I could understand how I made him feel. Then I hugged him tight and told him how sorry I was for yelling at him and for what it made him feel. • If I can tell you one important tool when it comes to your inappropriate emotional responses to your kids, it would be this: APOLOGIZE!!! • This is how we teach our kids empathy and grace. This is how we teach them right from wrong. This is how they learn that you make mistakes too. This is how we teach forgiveness and what it means to say “I’m sorry.” • I don’t even remember what Sawyer did that day to make me so angry. And there have been times when my anger has not only frightened myself, but my kids too😥 I know there was unrecognizable monster that came out of me that day and it scared us both. • Someone told me recently: "Motherhood is molding us into incredible human beings. It's not just us who are molding our children. And sometimes ALL the ugly needs to come out so we can confront what needs to change. It's okay. Forgive yourself, apologize to them, tell them you love them, and next time try better and do better." What a profound statement. • I have had some pretty ugly mom moments. And with those moments have come: • Shame. Guilt. Isolation. Sadness. • However, there is also beauty, strength, growth, forgiveness. and healing that is coming out of my story. Rest in the fact that your journey is molding you too. Learn from your mistakes. Learn from each other. Make a change ❤️ #confessionsoftheangrymom
#ad Ever since we moved out of my parents house, one of the major adjustments for me has been planning our dinner meals. Do you meal plan? This has been so helpful and often way less stressful when trying to plan for the evening. Recently I discovered that the @krogerco meat and seafood department is the ultimate burger destination! And @goldpeak sweet tea is the perfect beverage to pair your burgers with, which is available in a variety of flavors. The triplets actually love tea. They take after my Mom. We are looking forward to summer and the yummy summertime meals 😍To help with your summertime meals, right now you can save $3 on your delivery or pick-up order with your purchase of any of the 6 participating Tasty Tonight items at @KrogerCo! #CocaColaatKroger
Sometimes you have to straight up lock the door 😂🤷♀️🙈💃 #ripmomtruths
Dear Postpartum Depression, • I hate you. You hurt. You ruin. You steal. You devalue. You bring fear. You lie. You suck. • Even now, 3.5 years after you first entered my life, I cringe at the sound of your name. When I think about the triplets first year, I feel a lot of sadness, mostly because you robbed so much of my time with them. You stole moments and memories. You took time from me that I will never have back. People always told me I would look back at the newborn stage and I wouldn’t remember how hard it was: the exhaustion, the sleepless nights, the unrecognizable person staring back at me in front of the mirror; BUT I remember. • I remember feeling isolated, ashamed, and miserable. I remember the guilt and what it felt like to believe all the lies you told me about myself as a Mom. I remember when the panic attacks started and I began to feel insecure about being alone with my babies. I remember not feeling like a safe mom. I remember crying out to God so desperate for a change. • I also remember when I was officially diagnosed with “postpartum depression.” While there was so much shame I carried in the diagnosis, part of me was also relieved because it helped me understand more of what I was experiencing. I knew I was off. I knew something was wrong. I wasn’t myself and you were an opportunity for me to overcome a difficult season, to find strength and hope. • I bet you wanted me to drown in your lies and believe I wasn’t enough. But you didn’t win, and instead I rose. It has not been an easy journey for me, but I have learned tools and coping mechanisms of how to face you! I’ve grown because of you. I found strength in the valley you put me in. I’m sharing my story and I know it’s meeting hearts. I know its helping new moms who are in their own valleys that you have put them in. I stand for them, for me, for us. 💕 #dearpostpartumdepression Tee: @motherandbabes
To the Mama in Waiting, • I see you. • I know this is not the journey you asked for. I know the wait is hard and comes with so many agonizing and painful emotions. I know the feeling of being labeled “infertile” and what it causes you to feel as a woman. • I know it is hard watching your body continue to not work the way it was designed to work. I remember the feeling when I was officially and finally diagnosed with PCOS. I had all the signs and symptoms: extra hair growth, irregular cycles, and high testosterone. I never ovulated on my own and I felt like my body was a complete failure. • I know the feeling of constant negative pregnancy tests. And the jealousy that may cover your being every time you hear the words “I’m pregnant” from someone other than you. I know how hard it may be to attend baby showers and kid birthday parties. Mama in waiting, I know. • I know what it means to invest in your infertility journey financially, emotionally, and physically. I know how intense the shots and medications are to help get your body to work the way it should. I understand the fear of investing into fertility treatments not knowing whether it will be successful for you or not. • I know every journey is different and doesn’t always end the same, but more than anything l know there is ALWAYS hope. Hope to become Mothers. Hope that you will conquer and overcome. Hope that God will see you through. It is hard to see the bigger picture when you’re in the valley. • Mama in Waiting, I see you. I know this is not the journey you asked for or wanted BUT I do know that God makes beauty out of ashes. Infertility was my ashes, but God made it beautiful! My prayer is that you will lean on hope and that you will find the beauty in your ashes. You’re not alone in the midst of the pain infertility brings. I pray you will see beauty in your story and that God will guide you in your footsteps. I hope you will feel encouraged in your season of waiting. • Today I’m standing with some amazing women who are sharing their infertility journey! Head to @lauren.stewart_dc to hear her story 💕 #myinfertilityjourney • 🌈 tee: @themomculture
For a long time I used to think I was the only Mom out there who struggled with anger and rage. I constantly see Moms all around me with incredible calmness and composure with their kids. And then I see me, a Mom who, at times, is a loose cannon just waiting to explode 🙈 I used to think I was the only mom who couldn’t keep it together during a tantrum, who would end up finding myself deep breathing and sweaty doing everything I could think of to prevent a panic attack. But I guess behind all our pretty pictures and perfectly posed moments, there is something we are all facing, working on, or trying to overcome. • I finally started to slowly write about my Mom anger struggles and admit that I can be an angry mom. I was embarrassed and scared of what people would think of me when I shared the truth, that there is a side of me that absolutely terrifies me. I never even knew there was a part of me that could get so angry until I became a Mom 😥 It’s humbling, shameful, and such a struggle. My anger and anxiety often holds hands and it has been such a journey learning to cope and respond in high tense moments. • There is so much beauty in vulnerability. Being able to share with you that I’ve been working hard on my mom anger and my emotional response to my kids has been so rewarding for me. Thank you for reminding me that I’m not alone and that we are all in this together! I’m looking forward to bringing more light to this subject and creating a space where we can talk about Mom anger and learn tools to overcome it. ❤️ • 📷: @focusedinphotography
“Real women are fat and thin and both, and neither and otherwise.” -Hanne Blanke
I never knew so much anger even existed in me until I became a Mom. No one told me I would experience this kind of anger, raise my voice in a tone I’ve never heard before, and feel incredibly isolated and ashamed because of it. There are times when I don’t even recognize this person who has yelled relentlessly at my kids. It’s shameful, embarrassing, and humiliating BUT not yelling is really hard to do sometimes. • In the last year I have really tried to focus my response to my kids in high tense moments. I’ve been inspired by @simplyonpurpose and have done her #noyell challenges and have prayerfully and intentionally focused on my emotional response to my kids. • I feel like I am finally seeing growth, a change: • Every single time we get in the car the kids fight over where they are going to sit, so I started telling them where they would be sitting before we even got out the door in hopes that it would help. In some ways it has helped, but not yesterday. • We were running out the door to preschool and I said “Charlize is behind mommy. Jax is the middle. Sawyer is in the back.” • Jax did NOT want to sit in the middle and was throwing a tantrum about his seating arrangement. I got the other two buckled and told Jax “you can get in the car yourself or I will pick you up and put you in. It is your choice” He ran. I chased. I picked him up and tried to buckle him. He screamed and kicked and fought. I could feel my anxiety creeping in. I stopped and told myself “just breathe.” • Deep breath in. Deep breath out. • “I’m going to hold your legs down until you calm your body down because you’re hurting me when you kick and I need to get you buckled.” He eventually stopped kicking, but was still screaming. This was at least ten minutes in and I somehow managed to stay calm the entire time. “When you are finished crying, I will buckle you in and we will head out.” • I waited. And waited. And eventually he was ready. • The old me would have responded so much differently. There would have been yelling and lots of tears from him and me; and probably a panic attack too. But not yesterday 💕 Yesterday was progress! • Time. Intention. Grace. ❤️
I definitely live in everything, but sexy bras these days 😂🙌🏻 Mom bras and high waisted undies are 💯% way more my thing!!! #ripmomtruths